Contrary to what most people believe, mine wasn’t a story of epiphanies or self discovering journeys but instead a tale of an impulsive teenage girl searching desperately to derive meaning from a passion for fashion. With nothing but a doomed report card to show for it, it occurred to me that life was much more than double failure and two hour lectures from my dad who simply couldn’t understand why I spent hours sketching shabby designs of extremely malnutritioned figurines promoting what he termed as an inapposite industry instead of focusing solely on an esteemed curriculum such as Law which just so happens to be what I studied at the University.
In between the hours I spent trying to find my purpose between blank pages and crying myself to sleep, it dawned on me that fancy Chanel eye bags weren’t necessarily a trend I was willing to rock to 8 A.M classes with a classic plastic smile to shut down any form of human interaction that tried to inquire on my well-being. I had to figure it out even if it killed me! Needless to say that didn’t stop any Tom, Dick and Harry from offering a shoulder and a ton of advise buttered by mouthfuls of ‘…we are still young eventually you’ll figure it out so don’t sweat it’. Have you ever heard anything more frustrating?
Mid week morning, the sun is scotching, my tummy rambling from all the hostel food. Luckily the lecturer decides to cancel class and my room turns into a mini sorority. As I was doing my friend’s make up, this gorgeous human specimen looks up at me and says “why don’t you start blogging? It looks fun and you can talk fashion to a limitless audience instead of just us guys” Intrigued; I spent the next couple of days on Google trying to make sense of this term that was foreign to my untold vocabulary. I liked the idea but someone should have warned me research was much deeper that typing ‘blogging’ and reading a condensed definition from Wikipedia which forgot to mention that camera shy girls weren’t cut out for fashion blogging.Fast forward and here we are! Learning – to love myself and the lens that somewhat gives me more chills than biting into an ice-cream filled cone and loving every second of every day though presented by challenges and self doubt.
Napoleon Hill once said ‘Cherish your visions and your dreams as they are the children of your soul, the blueprints of your ultimate achievements‘.
Take note of your destination and realize that with every step you are closer to success than most people who are yet to even begin. I remember this 4 year old girl, the biggest tomboy but secretly played with dolls and loved Shout magazine and spent countless hours running from the neighbor’s house gathering materials and her brother’s room creating collections for her barbie dolls and though not old enough to handle a needle was never broken because Kim was always there. She might have been me but her spirit was much more remarkable than the reflection on the mirror today. Unlike most 21 year olds trying to conform to societal norms of 8-5 desk jobs, I’m more certain about my voyage through the fashion world than I was yesterday!
I might be spending numerous nights juggling between episodes of Scorpion and Big Bang Theory laughing hysterically at inappropriate Science related jokes and connotations but when it comes down to it, all I need is a pair of geeky glasses, a structured dress and enough blush on my cheeks to cover up my nervous interpretation of excitement when I meet Ellen DeGeneres to discuss what it feels like dressing Selena Gomez 😀 😀
Photos by Josie W.